Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
