Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize
