Pappa wants mamma naked
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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