Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
