Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize