YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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