Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
