Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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