Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize