so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
