Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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