I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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