Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
