Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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