She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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