I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize