Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The best revenge is premature balding
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
