I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
