...so i touched it.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
