My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
