a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
