I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
