I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
