at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
