Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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