I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i wish my penis had a tongue
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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