butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
