I skipped work to stalk him.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Randomize