Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
