Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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