If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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