Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
