i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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