apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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