"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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