very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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