i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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