Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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