uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
