Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
