NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
