I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
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