ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
