so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize