Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
