So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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