I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Randomize
