her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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