we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
