Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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